old

These are just some old poems from my red journal that I'm putting up in case I ever lose this book.


I'm almost content today
but the memories won't go away
I'd just like to start over new
and forget all the bad habits I do


I'm trying to be happy
but it's hard when your life's crappy
I'd love to laugh and smile
for more than just a little while


I'm going to find myself I swear
and never look back or care
I've been hurt and I've been broken
But now I'll be more outspoken


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Faking a small
can only last
last for a little while
until you remember
remember the past
then your happiness you lose
you lose it so fast


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I'm drowning in blue today
And I don't know what to think
And I don't know what to say
I just need my paper and ink


I feel the pressure now
Sadness lurking in my veins
And I just don't know how
How to heal my inside pain


I try to push it away
Keep it out of my mind
And think of words to say
Happiness I need to find


My pain is kept inside
And no one can see
My tears I always hide
I just want to be free


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I'm still numb
But I'm not sad
That is good
And I am glad

Things are changing
The good rises with my hope
I know not to let down my wall
But I am learning how to cope

I have my friends
and I have my will
I'm learning to be happy
And I need no more pills 


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